Give me a SIGN!

Sign on a Gynecologist's door:
"Dr. Dixon, at your cervix."

**************************

On a Podiatrist's door:
"Time wounds all heels."

**************************

On a Proctologist's door:
"To expedite your visit please back in."
**************************
On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
**************************

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
**************************
On a Tow truck:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
**************************
On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
**************************
In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and put you out."
**************************
On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."
**************************
On an Optometrist's office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
**************************
On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."
**************************
On a Fence:
"Solicitors welcome. Dog food is expensive."
**************************
In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
**************************
At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you pay your bill.
If you don't, you will be."
**************************
In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there hungry; Come on in and get fed up."
**************************
In front of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."
**************************
At a Propane Station:
"Thank heaven for little grills."
**************************

Above Pastor's Parking Space:
"Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Pastor's Spot."
********************